Guest Post!

My dear friend Amy got married over the weekend and now she's on her honeymoon. Guess what that means...I'm guest-posting for her! So please head on over to her blog and read about what I think brides *really* want to hear on their wedding day. Oh, and wish her a big congratulations, too :)

Guest Post: Tips for Getting (and Staying!) Organized

Hi, Burning River Bride readers! My name is Amy and I blog over at Little Miss Wedding Planner. I am so honored to be guest blogging for Em during her Honeymoon Week! We have been Internet-friends for quite some time now, and I am so happy for her and Josh.

So why did I call my blog Little Miss Wedding Planner? Because Planner should definitely be my middle name! I am Type A to the extreme, and as Emily put it in an email to me, “super ahead of schedule” when it comes to our wedding. I have set one goal for myself during wedding planning, and that is to have nothing to do during the wedding week.  Honestly, keeping that mantra in mind—and knowing how awesome it will be to have a few days off of work to just relax and welcome family and friends to town—has helped me to have a relatively stress-free experience because I am constantly reminding myself to stay ahead of the game.

I’ve always been really organized—ever since I was a little girl. My closet is color-coordinated, my DVDs are alphabetized, and my work life? Looks like this:

So you see, wedding planning is cause for me to be equally organized. It appeals to my Type A freakishness—to the extreme. Case in point: I have not one, but TWO wedding binders: one for general wedding planning and one solely for the guest list. 

I thought it might be helpful to give you guys a few tips and tricks for staying organized both during wedding planning AND in real life…so with that, here are some things to keep in mind:

1. Lists, baby. I am constantly keeping to-do lists. I just love the feeling of checking stuff off. [Wow, Nerd Alert!] Whether it’s wedding planning or grocery shopping, find a list format that works for you and stick with it. I love the wedding templates on the Russell and Hazel website, and even though I am not a mom yet, I am pretty much obsessed with the Mom Planners by MomAgenda. 

2. The key to organization is to make it your own. As soon as we got engaged, I ran right out to the bookstore and bought the biggest, baddest wedding planning binder I could find. Guess what? I hated it and never used it. It was big and bulky and out-of-date. If I had done a little research, I would have saved that money and gone ahead and made my own…which I did eventually. Lesson learned—and now I LOVE using my binder because it’s exactly what I need.

3. Get ahead, and stay ahead. I may be organized, but I can sometimes fall prey to that nasty habit of procrastination. Shocking, I know…but I have to say, wedding planning has helped me with that bad habit sooo much! We are in the midst of a super-long engagement (23 months total, when all is said and done), and I have knocked out so many projects that a lot of people would wait until two or three months before the wedding to do. (See also: bathroom baskets, all aspects of the rehearsal dinner, and day-of survival kits.) Get stuff done early and you’ll be thanking yourself later.

4. Give yourself a break. I’ll go on benders where I am working on projects multiple days in a row and into the wee hours of the night. This inevitably leads to a crying jag when I get tired. The key to avoiding this—and not having a lot of stress when it comes to this stuff—has been having self-imposed moratoriums on wedding stuff. If I feel like I am getting too bogged down, I take a break—even for a couple of days or a week, if necessary. Just stop thinking about it for awhile, and then you can come back to it feeling really refreshed. Same goes for other areas of your life. Spring cleaning got you overwhelmed? Work on one closet or room at a time before moving to the next. And if one closet takes all day? That’s fine! But after that, give yourself a break! Have a glass of wine and watch some crappy reality tv. You can get back to cleaning—and wedding planning—tomorrow. Trust me, it will definitely save your sanity!

5. Similarly, while it’s a great idea to make a plan, it’s also important to allow yourself to be flexible. Easier said than done, right? Especially if you are a perfectionist (ahem, like me). Just be realistic when you’re taking on new tasks. Example: I designed and put together our Save-The-Dates and envelopes (with liners!), and while it was a fun project and I love how they turned out, I learned a valuable lesson in doing so: DIY invitations are not for me. So the new plan is to order our invitations, but make all of our other paper products—menus, place cards, favor tags, etc. Originally, did I want all of our paper products to match? Yes. Am I ok with the fact that because of the new plan, the invitations will look similar to the menus but not exactly match? Yes. Why? Because I’m the only one who will notice, and honestly? I don’t care. Your reception paper products will still look cohesive, and I promise no one is going to notice that they don’t match the invitations. 

So, that about wraps it up for my quick tips on how you too can be a freakishly organized bride (or wife!). Give them a try! Now you tell me: what are your best tips for staying ahead of the game?

Guest Post: Blog, baby, blog!

Hi guys! I was so excited when Em asked me if I’d be interested in writing a guest post for her while she was on her honeymoon. It’s hard to believe she’s seriously married! We’ve been ‘blog friends’ for several months now and our weddings used to seem SO far away. Now she’s a married woman and I’m less than 3 weeks away from my wedding!

I wasn’t really sure what I wanted to blog about, but I decided what better topic than blogging itself? When I started my blog last July, I had NO idea what a great experience it would be. Now I encourage all brides to blog about their planning process!

First, I have met some of the BEST women and fellow brides in the world, hands down. I’ve gotten feedback on ideas, assurance for my silly worries, and most of all friendship from these ladies. While I’ve only met two of my blog friends in person, I seriously hope I’ll have the pleasure of meeting more of them in the future. I talk to several of them almost every day, and I honestly count them as some of my favorite friends.

There are also SO many resources available to brides through wedding blogs. If you’re a DIY bride, there are tons of free tutorials and templates that are incredibly helpful. And if you’re not, there is so much inspiration and so many gorgeous weddings that can help you find the feel you’re going for.

Lastly, I’m a huge sentimentalist and I want to remember how much I loved (most of the time) planning my wedding. There are a couple different sites out there that allow you to turn your blog into a book, which would be such a fun keepsake! Blurb offers a product called Blurb Books and Blog2Print offers books as well. All you have to do is put in your blog hyperlink!

(Source)

I can’t emphasize enough what a great experience blogging has been and how much I’ve gotten out of it. If you’re already reading this you’ve obviously discovered blogs, but if you haven’t started one of your own, DO IT! You definitely won’t regret it. 

Em, I’m sure you were an absolutely gorgeous bride and I seriously cannot wait to see your pictures! I’m so thankful for your friendship and that our blogs provided us with an opportunity to get to know each other! Enjoy every single second of your honeymoon, girl!

For the rest of ya’ll, feel free to come visit me at my blog: Lucky in Love

Guest Post: She's Soo La La

Hey-o Burning River Readers! “Happy Hour with a Housewife” blogger, Laura here (some others may know me as Miss Mojito from “With this ring, I thee blog”) and I was delighted when Em asked me to be a guest blogger while she was on her fabulous honeymoon with her new hubby!  When Em asked me to write a post for her blog I started stressin’ yo! I didn’t have any clue what to write to impress ya’ll... and let’s be frank, I’m using this opportunity as a shameless plug for my own blog aren’t I?!

So you can put a face with the name

So Em is awesome... I could go on about so many things! We live across the country from each other but we couldn’t be more similar and meant to be bloggity buds.  We share a love for RENT (the musical, not paying for it monthly), bitching about idiots involved in our weddings, and talking about the differences between a Brazilian Blowout & Wax. (Editor's note: I secretly believe that there is actually *no* difference between the two and Laura is pulling a fast one on me.)

So now that I’ve blabbed on a little bit, mostly because I still don’t know what I’m going to write about, I guess I should get to some type of point.  I guess what I want to share with some of you today is what I feel are the top things you need to discuss with your significant other before tying the knot.  Agree or don’t, this is just the Top Ten things I feel are important to have a clear understanding about with each other before jumping in...

1.   KIDDOS – This always seems like an obvious one but make it clear.  Because I’ve personally known girls to act completely blindsided when they find out their husband doesn’t want any kids.  Discuss how many children you want to have and more importantly when.  Most girls want to be young moms and finishing up by the time their thirty... while your hubby might be more interested in having fun for a while and possibly waiting until he feels his career is more established.  Okay now you’ve had kids... who’s going to stay home with them? Or will you put your child in day care.  And will you be putting them in public or private school, maybe even homeschool?  This is one we haven’t decided on yet.  I went to private school my whole life and the hubs went until 8th grade. I think it might depend on our location once we have children.

2.   RELIGION – Do you both share the same views? Is it alright if you don’t? If you don’t share the same religion do they at least “mesh”?  Is one of you willing to convert to the other’s religion?  Will your religious value affect your sexual values? For example, some religions don’t believe in ANY form of birth control.  This is definitely something to spend some time discussing if you don’t share the same views.  My hubs and I had all of the same religious views when we met so this was thankfully an easy one for us.

3.   DAY TO DAY LIVING – How do you live day to day and what do you expect your living situation to be like? What are your eating habits that you grew up accustomed to... eating out every day or just on special occasions? Where will you be eating the dinner... in front of the tv or at a table as a family?  What is one persons extra expenses that maybe the other thinks is a waste? The hubs and I decided we would have a specific dollar amount a month that we can spend on WHATEVER and anything over that we should talk to each other first.  My whatever money goes to things like nail appointments and Brazilian blowouts while his might go to a round of golf with a buddy.

4.   FINANCES – Who is primarily in charge of the money? Who will be paying all of the bills? Will you both work full time? Will you have separate checking accounts or will it be joint checking? We decided to do joint checking which we actually did about four months before we were married.  Best decision we personally ever made.  It was never a discussion (read: argument) on who was paying for what... it was paid and that was it.  Next, how are you going to save and what are you going to save for?

5.   DEBT LEVELS / CREDIT – This I think is really important.  Before the hubs met me he NEVER had a credit card... that was until he wanted to buy me an engagement ring, buy couches we wanted, etc. I on the other hand had a lot of credit cards in my time.  About the same time we got engaged I paid off a good chunk that I had built up when I first moved out when I was younger and was spending it all on food, gas, and booze.  It’s not fun paying for that Long Island Iced Tea from four years ago let me tell you.  Sometimes debt is really important to one person... I have a friend who didn’t tell her future husband about $6k in credit card debt she had... but you have to remember, your debt is now going to be his debt as his will be yours.  EVERYTHING needs to be put out on the table.  If possible, I think it’s a great idea to try and find a financial advisor to help you find the best way to get out of debt in your situation (school loans, credit cards, etc.) and how you can start saving money for emergencies and retirement.

6.   “ME” TIME – How will you both be spending your free time after work and on weekends?  Will there be a specific day of the week that will be YOUR date night and nobody will consider planning anything that night?  Are you used to a girl or guys night out that is a tradition that you expect to keep? I had to make it clear when I first met my husband that I love my friends and I don’t plan on giving up regular time spent with them.  Luckily he loves them so has never had an issue with me spending time with them whenever I want.

7.   CHORES – This one’s simple. Who’s going to do what? Cooking? Cleaning? Shopping? Trash? Etc? This is what the hubs and I did and it worked out fantastic.  Both of you separately write out a list of what you think the “husband duties” are and what you think the “wife duties” are.  Come back together and compare lists.  The ones that match, perfect. The ones that don’t discuss and come to a logical decision.

8.   CAREER – Will you both be working full time? Maybe you will work part-time and then do the stay-at-home wifely duties? What about once you retire... are you seeing yourself on a cabin in the woods, the balmy beaches in Florida, or the dessert resorts of Palm Springs or Scottsdale?

9.   LOCATION – This has been a biggie for me and the husband although I think just within the past week we know where we see ourselves... and that’s pretty much right where we are.  We have both grown up in Southern California and have wanted to be anywhere from Oregon to Arizona to the beach.  Make sure you both see the same vision on where you want to have your family’s home be.  The more you cannot have to move around the better and you both want to be happy... not all of us can be a little bit country and a little bit city.

10. PERSONAL GOALS – Discuss your personal goals that you’ve had set for yourself since before you even met your significant other.  Make sure you both are fully aware of what you want to accomplish in life and support each other in the most realistic ways as possible.

Duuuuuude, am I boring or what? I think I tried to hard to want to be the funny blogger on Em’s blog... instead I felt compelled to share something my husband and I did before getting married and it was a great experience.  We made it a big date night and discussed all of these things... most we already knew but it was nice to reiterate some things as well as learn more about each other we didn’t really know.

I swear I’m not always so preachy and I actually do have some fun on my blog... so if you’d love to follow my journey as a newlywed please visit me at my blog, www.happyhourwithahousewife.com & if you’d like to see the journey before my big day you can always check out my old blog, http://withthisringitheeblog.blogspot.com!

Thanks for having me Em and I hope your wedding was nothing short of fabulous! And Burning River Readers... well, if you’re still reading... thanks for listening to me blabbb.

XO,
Laura

P.S. You can also follow my daily antics on Twitter... www.twitter.com/mesoolala

 The Mojitos!

Guest Post: Keep It FUN

*Today we have Stacey aka Born to be Mrs. Beever from Thoughts of the All Consumed Bride. She is, in a word, awesome. Please check out her blog (she's recently married and in the process of recapping her gorgeous wedding!)

I am thrilled to be able to write a guest post for Em over here this week while she is basking in the glory of her new love and marriage!  What a joy I know it will be for her and I am so excited to see the amazing photos and beauty that will exude from her on her wedding day!

Today, I'd love to share with you a little quote I found from Katherine Hepburn:

I never lose sight of the fact that just being is fun.

In life, as in love, you need to always have a little fun.  After all, what is the point of being in a relationship if there is not a good deal of laughter and enjoyment from the day to day routine activities?  Especially once you're married.  I have found that in the 2 1/2 weeks that Mr Fix It and I have been settling in to married life in the same home as husband and wife, it is difficult to not fall into a boring, mundane routine with little or no excitement.  And that's where Mr Fix It's personality comes in to the rescue!

Mr Fix It was definitely a little rambunxious as a child, but today, he's a big kid almost every day.  Don't get me wrong, he works...and hard.  His job is physically and mentally demanding.  And he's pretty tired after a long day at work.  So when it's time to run errands, he has to find ways to interject some fun.

For example, when we went shopping for my nephew, PJ's 1st b-day gift at Toys R Us, he found a big bin of bouncing balls in the middle of an aisle.  He grabbed one and said "I'll give you a 3 second hard start for dodge ball!"  When I looked at him and told him to knock it off and be an adult and put the ball down, he just reiterated that I was only being given 3 seconds.  When another customer came around the corner, I assumed he would put the ball down and act his age, but when I turned over my shoulder to look at him, I knew I better run!  And there we were, causing havoc in Toys R Us.

And that is one of the reasons I married him just last month...because no man has ever been able to do silly things like that and learn to just have fun in the silliest of ways.  It's really there within all of us, that element of fun.  We just need to learn not to stifle it and to let it come out and play once in a while.  I'll admit, that I don't typically lean that way in my day to day activities, but being around Mr Fix It, I've learned to play some jokes, make funny faces or even pull off some fun wrestling matches sometimes at unexpected times.

I believe laughter and fun are an essential part of any relationship...not just with children, but with spouses as well.  And today, as I congratulate Em and her new hubby on their recent marriage, I also wish them a lifetime of fun filled days and lots of laughter.  I am sure we will see those beautiful smiles full of joy and fun in the photos and recaps that I for one am so excited to follow very soon!

Guest Post: 10 things I learned from my wedding

Here to kick off Guest Post Week is Kelly and all you need to know is that she's hilarious. And awkward. And she loves pugs. And her husband. But I think she may love pugs more.

So. I'm married. For about two months now! My wedding was awesome, but not without drama. If you've ever read my blogs, you know that drama and awkwardness tend to follow me. I stressed out before the wedding about small details and things that could go wrong. Few of those things went wrong - but plenty of others did. Here are the ten things I learned from my wedding planning, in some cases things I wish I knew before, others, things I'm glad I did. I hope they can help you guys who are engaged... but also, I want to hear what the marrieds think! Anything you disagree with or could add would be welcome!

1. If you dislike someone before your wedding, you're not going to like them at the wedding. Just ignore them. My hubby's aunt wore a full on white dress to our wedding. I cringed during my MIL's impromptu speech at our reception.

The uninvited uncle who brought a date didn't bring anything else by way of a card, gift, or even a kind word. These people, who make your lives miserable on a daily basis, they aren't going to kiss your feet cause it's your wedding. They're there for free food. Ignore them, limit the time your photographer spends photographing them, and move on. No use being shocked. Prepare yourself now.

2. You are going to have no time before your wedding. Get things done early. When I tried to make plans, I pretty much procrastinated, thinking it was "too early." Prime example- the music and readings for our ceremony. I felt like making those assignments early was silly and would be laughed at. Who was laughing when I was cutting our program sheets the week of our wedding? The Kinko's man, that's who. I should have just sucked it up and figured that out months before - then I could have made the programs early instead of finishing them while my hair was being done.

3. Don't take shit from vendors. If you want something, yes, listen to their suggestions. But then decide on your own. No one should push you around. Do your research, ask around, and absolutely do not hire anyone who gives you crap. If a vendor ignores you (like my cake-topper maker did) or gives you crap, then just tell them they can give you a rim job for all you can. Then blog about them. It's fun and vengeful. Luckily I figured these things out pre-wedding and at the end of the day - my vendors were amazing. If you cannot hug a vendor, IMHO, either you need to loosen up, or you need to fire them. But then again I'm awkward and hug-friendly. Use your own discretion.

4. Tell your groom what to do. I tried to be hands-off and we were three weeks out with no tuxes and no groomsman gifts. Make your fiance a list early, and tell him to do it all. Check in monthly. I wish I had. Luckily we busted it out and got stuff done, but it could've been a disaster. And it wasn't fun showing up at Men's Wearhouse month of.

5. Eat. Ugh, nuff said. I didn't at our appetizer hour and ended up stuffing my face at the reception. Luckily I had a reception dress, but if I hadn't, my poor corset might've burst. Bring yourself snackies.

  
6. Give yourself at least a day between the wedding and honeymoon. I know, I know, not typical. But if you are a last minute idiot like me, you won't have time before the wedding to shop for bikinis and flip flops. We frantically shopped and packed the day after our wedding. Then we had a good night's sleep and an easy trip to the airport the next day. It's not required, but it definitely improved our situation.

7. Take pictures of EVERYTHING. Assign your camera to a family member without shaky hands who doesn't have their own camera. Make a list before the wedding of all the cute tiny elements of your wedding that you want pictures of. You don't want to go to blog about a detail, only to realize that it never got it's 15 minutes of photographic fame!

8. First looks- do them. Your flowers will only wilt more, you will only get more tired. I worried endlessly about taking pictures before taking away from our time at the ceremony. And yet, walking down the aisle was one of the most emotional moments of my life. I'm sure for some people, it's not the right choice. However, if it seems like it would work for you, but you're nervous about the ceremony being less important, don't. (Worry, that is. Don't worry.) Geez, let me just sum up my rambling with first look = convenient and special.

9. If someone/something is important to you.... have them be in your pictures. For me it was Pugs and my mom. They were in our pre-ceremony pictures. If you have a pet snail that means the world to you and you can't imagine your day without your precious snaily, then include snailypoo by all means. If it's not possible to have your loved one there for some reason, include a picture, or do something meaningful. Don't give a shit about anyone saying anything about "weird snail weddings" or "pug hair on black tuxes." That's what lint rollers are for.

10. Always wear sunscreen on your honeymoon. Seriously.

I'm still finishing my wedding recaps on my wedding blog, http://misspug.blogspot.com. You can find my regular blog at http://kjpugs.wordpress.com as well. Don't forget to check out Blog Buddy Appreciation Day this Tuesday!